


this mess we're in

by vxxv



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Manga Spoilers, Porn with Feelings, Post-Time Skip, spoilers up to 108
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-06
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-25 21:51:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16206386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vxxv/pseuds/vxxv
Summary: Their faces are close together in hushed conversation and Mikasa keeps looking between the gold of his eyes and his lips. Perhaps Eren notices because he places a hand on her thigh and makes the first move; delicately and chastely placing his lips against hers. The move is a bit bold on Eren’s part and makes Mikasa shakily inhales, hands rattling as she raises a palm to settle against his cheek and kisses him back.Behind them, amongst the din of blood rushing through her ears, she can hear her friends whooping and hollering, and a shout of ‘finally’. She laughs quietly to herself more than anything and Eren eyes her with a smile and leans in to kiss her again, and for a moment, the world is more beautiful than it’s ever been.





	this mess we're in

**Author's Note:**

> wow, i haven't written fic in a long time, so here is so un-beta'd emotional porn with a lazy ending, mostly because i needed to get it out of my system and because the latest chapters of the manga have been hurting my eremika heart lmao

_i._

When Eren kisses Mikasa for the first time, it comes during the build of the railway – the quiet period where the 104th spent sweltering summer days setting tracks in the countryside while keeping watch over Eren.

It’s at the tavern in Trost, and the mood is merry. Mikasa is drinking wine and is fondly gazing at Sasha while the girl excitedly explains something to her. She catches Eren looking at her and excuses herself to speak to him. His face is rosy from drinking beer, but it is the happiest she has seen him in a while – a few days ago, he had expressed just how much they all meant to him, and his mood had seemingly lifted at the confession.

Their faces are close together in hushed conversation and Mikasa keeps looking between the gold of his eyes and his lips. Perhaps Eren notices because he places a hand on her thigh and makes the first move; delicately and chastely placing his lips against hers. The move is a bit bold on Eren’s part and makes Mikasa shakily inhale, hands rattling as she raises a palm to settle against his cheek and kisses him back.

Behind them, amongst the din of blood rushing through her ears, she can hear her friends whooping and hollering, and a shout of ‘finally’. She laughs quietly to herself more than anything and Eren eyes her with a smile and leans in to kiss her again, and for a moment, the world is more beautiful than it’s ever been.

_ii._

The second time they have sex, Eren holds Mikasa’s hips as she sits above him, vigorously riding him with her head tilted backwards and mouth ajar. 

He watches her as she strives to meet her peak, his hands firmly over her hip bones, watching as her abdominal muscles flex and twitch, the bounce of her breasts as she jerks riding his cock, listening to the small, desperate noises she makes while chasing her release.

Eren sits up and pulls her close to him, fastening his arms around her waist pressing his face between her breasts and kissing her sternum, switching between each breast as he pulls her nipples between his teeth. Each time she cries out and moans his name and he thinks that it’s the sweetest noise, and thinks about how much sweeter it will sound when she’s calling him as he makes her come.

He turns them over and has her back to the mattress, hooking both of her legs in front of his arms as he begins to fuck into her roughly, listening to her chant his name as he bites into her neck. She cries out, tells him that she feels so safe and so full of him and that she’s so, so desperate to come. 

He appeases her and moves a hand to her clit and uses two fingers to rub circles into the bud and watches as she arches erotically off the bed, mouth wide and crying _Eren, Eren, Eren_ as she comes and scrambles for purchase against the sweat-soaked sheets. He shivers as he feels the clench of her cunt around his cock and bites down on his tongue, so he can fuck her through it. He wrenches out of her at the last second, leaning over down to kiss desperately as she takes his cock soaked with her come and jerks him to completion as he kisses her, gasping against her lips as he soaks her abs with his come.

“I love you”, she murmurs against his open mouth. She never needed to tell him that but knowing so fills his chest with warmth. He falls asleep with Mikasa stroking his hair and his head on her breast, knowing that this won’t last forever.

_iii._

Eren makes love to her one more time before he leaves. Before he comes to her room that night he packs a bag for Marley – he’s meeting Yelena in the early hours of the morning and is riding south from Shiganshina with her to the port.

His heart hurts, and he feels like he’s committing an almighty betrayal. He knows that when Mikasa wakes up in the morning and she realises that he’s not in bed with her that she’ll look for him, and then he’ll find the note he left her, and the ones that he left the others, and he feels so terribly about it. But this is what must be done if he ever wants to secure safety for Paradis and save the Eldians, then he must keep moving forward.

He kisses Mikasa senseless, slowly and sensually for what feels like hours, biting her lips and licking into her mouth; he loves how her nose slots against his and the small smile on her lips as he whispers sweet words against them. He loves her, he’s in love with her, and it irritates him that it took him so long to realise the nature of her feelings for him and that he eventually felt the same.

He lavishes all his attention on her, for this is the last time in a long time that she will see him, that they’ll be together, and when there is a next time, he expects that she will be furious.

His mouth is on her cunt and her long legs are pulled over his shoulder and every time he makes her come he feels the press of her heels into the muscle of his back. She is so wet against his mouth and he can slip three of his fingers into her easily, curling upwards and sucking her clit between his lips and pressing the flat of his tongue against her slit – every sound she makes sounds like music to his ears, and he loves to listen to her babble incoherently every time she comes.

She lies on her side and Eren slides in behind her, sweeping her much longer hair away from her neck so he can press kisses against her jaw and bared throat. He grips her thigh and lifts up so he can slide himself into her soaked heat, groaning as he feels her tight heat around his cock. He fucks her, her head back and resting on his shoulder as he keeps a hand splayed across her stomach, another hand reaching underneath her to feel her breasts. “Fuck, Eren, please make me come,” she whines, and he can barely refuse her.

He reaches between her legs and finds her clit once more, shifting himself ever so slightly to change the angle he’s penetrating her at. He listens to her gasp intermittently between the sounds of his pelvis against her backside when he inevitably feels her squeeze him in what is without a doubt the most intense orgasm he has ever brought on. Mikasa bucks and thrashes against his chest, sounding as if she’s practically sobbing, turning her torso so she can kiss him, her mouth tastes like salt from the tears and her face is wet from perspiration and crying. “I love you,” she cries, sounding strained and desperate. Eren is still in her, fucking into her for release and she lets him, takes a hand of his and secures it against her stomach as she rides out her pleasure.

“C-come in me,” she eventually says, and the permission is a blessing. He buries himself in her and climaxes, moaning her name into her hair as he fills her. Mikasa whines and sighs, and after a few moments of heavy breathing lets out a laugh, content and satisfied. She turns in his arms and raises herself up to kiss him, not with lust-filled desperation, but with a sweetness that he didn’t think could be managed post-sex.

“I love you, Mikasa,” he eventually says, and her features soften so drastically that he thinks that she’s been waiting for him that say that to her for an eternity. They kiss one last time before settling to sleep. 

Hours later, Eren extracts Mikasa from his arms, and leaves.

_iv._

“You left me.”

Eren swallows. He did. 

“I don’t regret it,” is what he says, and he sees Mikasa seize up where she stands opposite him in the cell aboard the airship. “Marley was going to declare war and I had to do something.”

“So, you left, without telling any of us where you were going and then you call when it’s convenient.”

He looks up at her. Mikasa had delivered that line with such shaky conviction that it’s no surprise to her that her cheeks are stained with tears. She wasn’t wrong, and he wasn’t going to deny her that.

“I’m sorry.”

Mikasa nods shortly and wipes her tears. She thinks that she does not know this Eren, on top of that, Sasha is dead. She feels betrayed. And after several moments, she speaks.

“All I’ve ever wanted,” she begins, voice laced with emotion. “Is for you to be safe and to be close. I wish that you wouldn’t always go where I can’t follow.”

Then, she leaves, and all Eren can hear is the sound of the airship engines, and the thundering of his own heart in his ears.

Mikasa was right; there was no coming back from this.


End file.
